House of Tanks, House of Lace
by TrixieKrueger
Summary: One of Patricia's belongings has gone missing and Eddie is behind it's disappearance. What she doesn't know or realize is that he may have stolen much more than she thinks, including her heart. Peddie. One Shot. Rated T for very mild themes. (Prequel request now added making it a two parter.)
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything.

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><p>Eddie startled up from his pancake feast as Patricia slammed the front door and rushed up the stairs. He could only presume that Amber had twisted all the vague questions he'd asked her that afternoon into just the message he had hoped she would relay to his girlfriend.<p>

With one last whipped cream drenched bite and an eager smirk, he went chasing up the Anubis House stairs after her.

The tall blond found Patricia digging through a drawer, feeling for the familiar black studded box he knew she had hidden out of sight. The redhead let out a triumphant 'Yes!' when the box finally grazed her fingertips. Her happiness short lived as she pulled it out opened and empty.

"Oh no! No, no, no, no, no!"

She riffled through the drawer once more, turning its contents upside-down. She cursed under her breath, resorting to pulling items completely out to look again. It just _had_ to be in there.

From where he leaned against the open door frame, Eddie was growing more amused by the second.

"Lose something, Yacker?"

Patricia slammed the drawer shut at the sound of his voice and whirled to face him. Her smile wasn't the least bit convincing and she knew it.

"Eddie! 'Course not, why would you say that?"

He gave her a sidelong glance, his eyes drawn down to her hands.

She followed his line of sight to the fist that was still clutching one of her 'sexy' bras. Her cheeks flushed with color and she stashed it away as fast as she could.

"Lucky guess," he laughed, strutting into her room. "Want me to help?"

"No, you can't! I mean… You probably shouldn't help me look."

He met her frantic green eyes with a look of suspicion.

"I'm looking for some uhh… Some girl stuff! Yeah! I really don't think you want to help me find that do you? And I _really _need to find it soon so you should just…"

Patricia gestured around him to the door, but to her dismay Eddie simply responded with a lopsided grin.

"I'm a little better at finding 'girl stuff'," he began, his face twisting briefly into disgust, "than you think I am, Yacker."

He took his closed fist out of his pocket, a tiny silver chain looped around one finger. Her face lit up when a necklace with a sparkling silver tank charm dropped down on command as he released his grasp.

"Aw yes! Where did you find it?"

He pursed his lips trying to contain his utter joy as he shoved his other hand into his pocket.

"Oh, right where you left it. Right next to these…"

Her eyes widened as Eddie pulled a pair of her black lace boy shorts out of his pocket. She grabbed for the hijacked undergarment, failing to retrieve it before it was returned to the prison in his pants.

"Uh, uh. If you want 'em you'll have to come get 'em, Yacker."

He flashed his eyebrows at her, trying to bite back the smirk on his face.

"You cockroach! I thought Trudy confiscated those from the wash for being 'inappropriate'! You've had them hidden this whole time?"

"Well, maybe not the _whole _time…" he started, eyes twinkling mischievously. "You should've seen how red Fabian's face got when he saw them lying beside my bed one day! I didn't think it was possible for anyone to even turn that color!"

She let out a huff and threw her arms up dramatically.

"Oh yeah, I'm sure it was a riot! Now he probably thinks we 'noodle' in his room!"

"Hey! It's my room too and it's none of his business what I do in there when he's gone."

Patricia snickered and Eddie cleared his throat.

"_Anyway_… No," he sighed. "I had to admit that we haven't 'noodled' at all before he dropped dead of embarrassment. I just wanted to mess with him a little; I didn't think he'd stutter until he couldn't breathe! Obviously I misjudged all the sneaking out he's been doing at night…"

She rolled her eyes, needing to change the subject and fast. Eddie didn't need to know why _any_ of them were sneaking out at night again. As far as he knew, the mystery was over and she wanted to keep it that way, Osirian or otherwise.

"So… Want to tell me why you took my necklace?"

His features instantly sobered, and he let out a heavy sigh.

"I don't know, I guess I just needed to see if you'd ever miss it. You kinda stopped wearing it Patricia and then you didn't even notice it's been gone the last two weeks. That sort of thing could give a guy a complex you know."

She turned her back to him and held her hair up off her neck. He slipped it onto her just as he had done six weeks ago on her birthday.

"Sweetie saw it one day and went into this weird proud dad moment about how you spent all your money for the month to buy it for me. I've never had anything…real like this before and I'm just afraid to lose it."

He snaked his arms around her waist, pulling her against his chest. Eddie knew she was referring to more than just the necklace. It scared her more than it did him to be getting this serious.

"Hey. I spent that money for you to wear it, not hide it. It's completely yours as long as you want it to be. Alright? You're not going to lose it."

She closed her eyes as he reassured her, loving the feeling of being held by him. She didn't let him do it often and wanted to soak in every bit of it before she had to ruin it for herself.

"Alright already! Now let go of me, you know I don't like all this mushy couply stuff."

Patricia turned to push him off but he gently grabbed her wrists, holding her to him.

"You don't seem to mind when I do this…" he barely managed to mutter out before crashing his lips to hers.

She groaned against his mouth, moving her lips in perfect sync with his. This had always been the easy part for her—the kissing, the banter. In her mind she wouldn't fall for him this way, couldn't fall this way even. She figured she was just close enough to feel the heat but not get burnt by him.

Regardless, somewhere deep down in her soul Patricia knew she was in love despite her best efforts. And that's what terrified her the most. She constantly played it off and pushed it away but she could never completely shake it.

Eddie wrapped his arms back around her tiny waist, freeing her hands to roam down his solid torso. His stomach shuttered under Patricia's touch and it gave her a wicked idea. She caught him off guard by deepening their kiss and he was practically putty in her hands.

As they battled it out, she groped her way down and into his pants pocket to retrieve her captive underpants. She broke their kiss, grinning wildly up at him. Boy shorts hooked off one finger, held up like some sort of trophy.

Eddie hoped his brain would save this visual forever in case he never got to see it again.

"You are such a tease!" he breathed, watching her make her way back to her dresser.

"Maybe, maybe not," she called over her shoulder. "Where's Fabian?"

"He's nerding out at the library again… Why?"

He had tried not to sound too hopeful.

"Because…you've seen all my underwear so I think it's only fair that I get to see yours too."

Patricia gave him her most innocent look as she advanced towards him.

"You just want to search my drawer to see if I have anything else of yours, don't you?" he asked knowingly, stepping closer into her personal space.

She winked, taking his hand and dragging him towards the door.

"Maybe. Maybe not…"

Eddie smirked knowing that he was about to win no matter where this was going to end up.

Patricia would never think to look in Fabian's closet.

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><p><strong>AN:**_ I'm the one who submitted this anonymously to the hoa-headcanon blog. First story I've published anywhere. Try to be gentle on me. ;) **  
><strong>_


	2. Prequel

**A/N:** You may have already read this on the hoa-headcanon tumblr. It's just easier to put it here for reference. You don't have to review or read it again or anything. Just trying to get organized.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I don't own anything.

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><p><strong>Prequel<strong>

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><p>It had been innocent enough, turning back to send Piper a quick 'happy birthday' message before meeting up with Eddie downstairs. While they weren't exactly close anymore, it had seemed like the proper sisterly thing for her to do.<p>

Eddie had gotten antsy downstairs when ten minutes passed the hour had come and gone with no sign of his date. He had learned from his previous mistake and gone up to investigate, finding Patricia's door ajar just enough to see that she was already ready to go. But she was…engrossed in her laptop?

That notion set a wave of annoyance down his body. She was late for their date and her birthday surprises in favor of the computer. Eddie just assumed she was on her stupid blog again and knocked but didn't wait for an answer before pushing her door open.

"Do you know what time it is, Patricia?" he accused.

She picked her gaze up from the screen to reveal smudged eyeliner and a red nose. She was crying and Eddie was immediately stricken with panic. Patricia Williamson doesn't cry.

"Whoa, hey, what's wrong, Yacker…what happened?" He crouched down beside her bed but was met with silence. "Please Patricia, you're scaring me," he whispered.

"This!" she shoved the screen towards him, gasping for breath as another sob wrecked her body.

Eddie stared at the screen, confused at first by what he saw.

Patricia's chumchatter page was open to what appeared to be a photo of her standing between an older couple, a cake on the table in front of them. The only thing different about this girl and the one in the room with him was the smile on her face. He glanced up to question her but found her head turned, the redhead trying to settle her tears. Without prying he took a closer look at the photo for himself.

It had been uploaded today, and he could feel his heart sinking as the realization hit him. "Yacker, is this…" his voice was soft, but he couldn't quite bring himself say it.

"They're supposed to be out of the country, but instead they went to visit Piper!" she burst, her tears probably more out of anger than sadness. "As if they could forget that it's my birthday too… They just didn't care! None of them did!"

He gently closed her laptop, resisting the urge to slam it shut for fear he could actually break it. Doing this behind her back was one thing and not surprising in the slightest based on what she had told him about them but flaunting it in her face…well that was another. The worst part was that he had no idea what to say to her to make it better. He knew from experience there wasn't much that _could _be said.

"I'm so sorry, Yacker. Don't… Don't worry about our plans, we'll just do them another time…" He moved up to sit at the foot of her bed. She yanked her feet away as he began to unzip her boots to slide them off.

"Unless you're still up for it tonight?…"

She shook her head and let him continue, both of them thankful that her tears were starting to slow down as she wiped at her face.

"Could you shut the door? I'd rather mope in private."

"Sure, I'll just go downstairs and let—"

"I don't want to spend my birthday completely alone, _Doofus_. Just mostly. You can stay."

He gave a lopsided smile at the small grin that flashed across her face before it disappeared again.

"Whatever you say, Birthday Girl," he teased. "Now, I don't want to ruin _everything_ I had planned but… I _sorta_ made a cake for tonight and I don't think it's going to last until the do-over date so… Can I go get that and _then _we'll mope together?"

She smirked at him as he stood up, "It's not a pancake cake, is it?"

"Ehhh, I didn't say that…" he buried his hands in his pockets and flashed her a mischievous grin.

"Sounds about right," she mused, rolling her eyes. "Go on."

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><p>Of all the things Patricia hadn't planned to do but had done on her birthday, Eddie was sure falling asleep at half past eight was near the top of her list. They had laid in her bed face to face stuffed with birthday pancake talking about anything that came up and Eddie taking every opportunity to make jokes that she pretended to laugh at.<p>

It was almost nice, considering the circumstances.

Patricia had been vulnerable in front of him for an extended amount of time, she really was human after all. In those moments before she had drifted off, she was letting him completely in without regrets. He knew that wouldn't be the case once she woke up so he hadn't dare moved yet in fear he would disturb her.

She rolled over in her sleep and Eddie glanced up at the clock. It was nearly nine and he would need to be leaving soon before the other girls were made to come upstairs. Since he hadn't gotten the chance to properly surprise her for her big day, he had decided as she slept that he wanted to leave her gift as a nice surprise for her to wake up to.

He checked around the room for the best place to leave it, deciding that only one place was a guarantee to be noticed right away but it would be tricky.

Eddie removed the necklace from its black studded box, carefully trying to thread one end through the small gap between her neck and her pillow. It had taken a few tries but he was eventually able to grab the clasp without waking her. He brushed her ponytail aside, placing a soft kiss against the back of her neck before closing the necklace onto it.

"Happy birthday, Yacker," he whispered in her ear as he got up. A small sparkling tank charm now lay against her pillow under her face.

He looked back to ensure his movement hadn't disturbed her slumber and he smirked at how ironic the gift and the delivery of it now were considering the events of the day. But the one thing the blonde had no doubts about was the fact that she would wake up tomorrow_ still_ the fiery tank to his softening, falling in love, tin can.

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><p><strong>AN:** _Thanks for reading, let me know what you think. :)_


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